In the last few months, I have become increasingly aware of the old ‘skinny vs. curvy’ debate. It’s really great to see more and more acceptance for girls who aren’t a ‘perfect’ size 2 and are considered curvy and plus size. What is not great to see, is that in some ways, the roles have been reversed and we are seeing Facebook memes and posts bashing skinny girls in a attempt to raise up curvy girls.
Popular phrases like ‘real women have curves’ and ‘men like women with meat on their bones’ suggest that those who are naturally slim are not ‘real women’. How awful this must make them feel!
Recently, the Megan Trainor song ‘All About That Bass’ has been getting a lot of air-time on the radio. It’s a super catchy song and is talked about as being a body acceptance anthem. It is so close, but unfortunately is ruined by some pretty terrible lyrics talking about ‘silicone stick figure barbie dolls’ and ‘skinny bitches’. Also her telling us not to worry about our size and ‘every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top’….. but only because that’s what the boys like.
Sorry ladies, but you need to love yourself for you and not because that’s what you think a boy will like!
Anyway, I posted this article which perfectly explains how I feel about the song on my facebook page and got a interesting and to be honest, surprising response from a follower.
“She’s not tearing down anyone. Girls refer to their friends as bitches all the time. People just like to play the victim. If the hardest thing you have to deal with as a girl is being called a skinny bitch then stop complaining please. Some of us have real problems.“
I’d like to address this topic… Firstly, not everyone calls their friends ‘bitches’ all the time. I certainly don’t and I don’t think the context in the song is using the term in a friendly manner.
Secondly, it’s a mistake to downplay any sort of bullying and especially body bullying. I have never been called too skinny but I can totally sympathise as it is exactly the same as being called too fat. Skinny or curvy, being bullied for your size is a horrible thing to go through, especially as it’s usually in puberty and your teens when you get the brunt of it. Nasty comments from your peers can stay with you for the rest of your life!
Body bullying can really affect some women- it might lead to a eating disorder, depression and unfortunately these can also then lead to suicide. In light of Robin Williams recent death, I think the lesson to take away is to be kind to everyone. If it makes you feel better to bring someone down for how they look, then I think you need to take a look at yourself and your own insecurities and address why you feel the need to act that way.
We get bullied by our peers as teens for our shape, be it skinny or slim, get told by the media that we have to look a certain way and we become insecure and develop low self-esteem. To make ourselves feel better, we then go on to bully someone else and so the cycle continues.
My point is that we are all beautiful, we are all unique, we are all women that come in different shapes and sizes and as soon as we stop waging war with our bodies and with each other, then we can help eliminate the awful cycle of body bullying.
Don’t starve yourself to fit into what society tells us is ‘perfection’. Trust me, once you get there, you will still unhappy. Don’t let those thoughts of ‘I’m too fat’ or ‘I’m not enough’ creep in. Don’t let yourself think nasty thoughts about others become a automatic reaction to seeing a picture of a woman with cellulite. Most of us have it, who cares!
Love yourself for exactly who you are and love your body for all it does for you. Be healthy, nourish your body, be happy and eat cake!
x Miss Victory Violet
Have a read of my ‘Mirror, Mirror’ post for some great tips on nutrition and loving yourself.
Categories: Body Confidence